Saturday, November 3, 2012

Motivation for Life Improvement

I am so aggravated with myself today, and in a mood of general self-loathing and despair.

*insert Debbie Downer*

I have been on such a fabulous roll in life for such a long time now.  I scored an awesome (and I mean AMAZING) husband, had my second wonderful child, got to become a stay at home mother, completed my second degree, started my own small business from my home (3 of them actually) and lost weight by developing better habits and watching what I eat.

And here I sit, about to blow it.

I procrastinate endlessly and feel like I've become this super lazy person.  I have been on such a roll working on writing my novel and then, this past week I have just done nothing...  I am INTENSELY eager to finish this thing, which still will require a lot of work and my MOM is even helping me expedite the process by typing it for me as I write it.  I have absolutely NO EXCUSE for slacking off on this.  None.  This is my dream.  I have already put endless effort into accomplishing my artistic goals with a certain level of success already, and my goals are in reach.  After everything my husband has given me, and sacrificed to help me reach these dreams, I have no business letting this slide.

Additionally, I am not nearly the housekeeper and home maker I once was.  I owe it to my family and myself to do better for us.  We all deserve a clean, peaceful, and chaos free living environment!

I have been far too docile with my ex husband with regard to the things he exposes my son to.  I keep my mouth shut too often, in hopes of avoiding confrontation, and I let things slide that should never have slid!  I am ashamed of myself as a mother...

Finally, I have been so proud of myself for a long time for getting down to a weight that I can live with, and getting back into the clothing that I love.  This is something that is TREMENDOUSLY important to me, and for the last couple weeks I have really slacked off on this as well.  Its like I just don't give a shit about anything.  When, infact, I have SO MUCH to give a shit about and its time I start acting like it.

Here are some new life changes I plan to make, each small, but working together I think will create drastic improvement in my daily life and mind frame.  Hopefully these can help you too!

1. Organize my environment
     - I have compiled a lot of interesting articles on Pinterest on organizing.  Simple things, like a DIY drain    cleaner so I could once and for all unclog the damn shower drain and my bath room so I could take a bubble bath once in a while.  Or a list of DIY cleaning products...  I am going to make a bucket list of household simplifiers to make the stuff that matters to me actually happen, easily.

2. Eat an apple for breakfast
    - I'm told an apple in the morning is better for energy than coffee.  We shall see.

    - This is so critical.  This is where I am going to start falling off the weight wagon and severely depress myself by gaining all my weight back.  I have been continuing to eat way past the point that I started feeling full just because the food is delicious.  The food can easily be saved for another time if I have too much on my plate.  This seems so trivial, I am sure, but this is huge for me.  It requires restraint.  Mind over matter.  If I learn to do this, I will change my life.  End of story.

4. Do not drink my diet
   - Caffeine has got to be gone.  I lose weight SO easily if I just give up the damn caffeine.  WHAT is my problem?  Ironically, when caffeine (such as coffee grounds) is used as a topical applied to the skin, it is said to tighten loose skin.  However, when consumed, caffeine can prohibit metabolism in some, which is CERTAINLY the case with me.  Conversely, cold water can be a metabolism booster.  Very simple equation here: -caffeine+water=skinnymommy

5. Start each day with exercise
   - I have so many excuses for not exercising, when really, there is none.  I fully intend to start getting up an hour earlier and working out each day.  I can have the time to myself before anyone else is up, without interruptions and it will improve my entire day.  Again, discipline and restraint!  I plan to start this practically with probably only a 10 minute Pilates session and work up to some of those insane Pinterest workouts eventually so that I can achieve my other dream of being a super strong ninja.

6. Be more clear of my expections
   - My ex husband pisses me off.  Only person on Earth can spike my blood pressure with just a facial expression.  But you know, I never EVER tell him!  He might actually stop if I tell him he's pissing me off.  Maybe he just doesn't know!  I realize in this particular instance this will be a waste of my time and energy, but its a good rule of thumb in general.  Its ok for me to be clear about what I need from people.  I have a bad habit of thinking that I know what people are thinking, and in so doing think they know what I'm thinking which is really just crazy!  Nobody will know what I think or what I need, if I don't tell them.  Whether I "get my way" by making myself clear or not is unknown, but definitely worth the effort.  I am learning in my business endeavors that it is much more prudent to be clear from the beginning to avoid conflict in the future and this is a concept I need to apply in all areas of my life.

7. Set minimum goals and exceed them
    - When I first started my novel in July I believe, I wrote about 20 pages and then Fraggled out on it.  But, a couple months ago, I decided that, despite my need to constantly be creating a variety of things, the novel is very important to me.  At that time, I set a daily goal of 3 pages that I must write every day, hell or high water.  The first week, I was very diligent in establishing new routines to discipline myself to get into this habit.  I have stuck to it, but usually manage to write closer to 10 pages a day.  Then, of course, for the past week, I've really slipped right back out of the habit, and have been Fraggling again!  I have still mostly gotten in my 3 pages a day, but I know that I am actually not satisfied with only 3 pages.  I am now increasing my minimum to 5 pages a day, with effort to exceed, so that I may achieve my goal of having the novel totally done, edited, revised, and ready to start submitting by Christmas.  Naturally, not everyone is writing a novel, but this is a good, basic way to pay daily attention to your own personal goal that tends to get shoved to a back burner.